I used to drive an amazing Jeep Cherokee. It had a manual transmission and a sweet Bayern sticker on the tailgate. That manual transmission allowed me to coast to stoplights or down hills. It was a way to save gas and just let gravity or friction get done what needed to get done. Coasting was easy and took no effort, but was still effective. I’ve been fond of coasting all my life, in more ways than just driving my Jeep. I’ve found ways to coast through most aspects of my life, it is stress free and gets things done, well enough. But, I’ve grown tired of coasting. It’s a passive activity that simply gets the minimum done. There is no advancement, and little excitement. My coasting days have come to an end.
Despite what my first post may seem to reveal, I wouldn’t say I’m an abject failure. Not accomplishing…or even truly pursuing one’s true dreams for decades does not mean that person is a failure in everyway possible. My default outlook is typically somewhat negative. This approach is a motivator to me…at least that is what I have always told myself. I do feel there is value by not candy coating your perspective of yourself. Brutal honesty leads to greater self-realization and ultimate progress than patting yourself on the back and thinking you are great all the time.
For me, I have high self-esteem in general. I always have. Trying to be honest about my shortcomings and seemingly hard on myself has never really been a negative. I can honestly knock myself down a reasonable amount but still feel perfectly happy and content with myself. This may not be true for others. Others might be more sensitive or have a more fragile outlook on themselves. If so, knocking yourself down…or even not building yourself up constantly, might be a huge negative. If this is true for you, I don’t recommend too much self criticizing.
This seemingly high self-esteem has its positives but it also has its negatives. For one, I feel it has allowed me to be too comfortable with my progress and accomplishments. It has contributed to my being too comfortable with coasting.
What is coasting? It is the activity of doing just enough in any or all aspects of life. It is finding the “minimal viable effort”, and then putting it in cruise control and relaxing in that space of being “good enough”, but not great. I am a master of mediocrity. But that is going to change.
I have accomplished some things in my life, but most things I have accomplished pale in comparison to the things my 18 year old self knew he was going to accomplish by the time he was my age. I own a home, I have no debt outside my small mortgage, I have a master’s degree, I have a stable career, I have good health, I have friends and many loving family members, I have an amazing wife who is perfect in everyway, and I have a perfect amazing baby daughter who is one month old. Anyone who has all that I do cannot ask for more. These many blessings in my life are not lacking…they are not the things that cause my need for an introvention. The reason I need this introvention is solely a result of my lack of effort in the past. My tendency to coast has kept me from reaching my full potential. My abilities and contributions to the world should be much greater. I have always known that I would do big things…but I haven’t, and that is unacceptable.
I don’t seek greater blessings, I simply seek to add more positivity, production, and progress to the world. That can only be done by cutting the cruise control and stepping on the gas. Time flies and I’ve wasted enough time coasting. My wife and daughter deserve better of me…I deserve better of me.
Throughout the intervention you may see what seems to be pretty negative self talk. It is not as it seems though. That is just my way of being honest with myself so I can stay accountable and step it up a notch. It has been a good ride thus far coasting through life…but it’s time to climb, so I can reach and keep the heights of great men.
